It's getting more and more difficult to look Dent in the eye. Not that I've ever really been all that great at looking people in the eye; I find faces harmless enough, but distracting, and so I look elsewhere when they're speaking to me. But figuratvely speaking it has been increasingly difficult. Because I have been less than honest. Oh, I haven't lied, per se. More a matter of omission. I've kept up with appearances because I don't want anything to distract him from getting his schooling done.
Instead, I've been gradually nudging him away. Or "weaning" him away from me. It's been mere hints; nothing obvious. I say things like "When you finish, you can get a better job, doing something you enjoy more. And live wherever you want".
Wherever YOU want. Not where WE want. I've been encouraging him to find his own interests and his own friends. In the hope that maybe, just maybe, he won't fall apart if I left.... We can only hope.
The weirdness at my end has spread. Things are being suggested to me, that I haven't heard anyone suggest in a long, long time. I'm not quite sure what to make of these suggestions. It's a bit difficult to describe without being graphic on what is supposed to be a family-friendly site. Also, it's difficult to determine if these suggestions will ever be acted on, or if the person is even serious about them (they live a bit far away to just "pop in" without some sort of notice). I've already been asked a couple of times, over the course of knowing this person, and turned it down each time due to one reason or another. I don't know if I've given this person the incentive to ask a third time.
And then, there's the "do I WANT to do these things that have been suggested" angle.
Oddly enough, it's been tempting.
The trees have finished leafing out, finally, and my maters have actually started growing. If I can just keep them going long enough, we may actually have some to harvest in a few months (or less, the biggest plant looks like it's trying to form flower buds already.) I doubt I'll end up with enough to can, but you never know. The peppers are a mixed lot; the cayenne's look ok, but the jals I had to re-seed, as the ones I transplanted looked a bit sickly. I replanted the thyme, and it's sprouted fairly well. The basil looks a bit thin, but maybe it just hasn't all sprouted yet.
As I write, a gray and orange skink pokes a nose around the potted plants, and comes to the edge of the plastic tray, tiny tongue flicking out. It decides it doesn't like the look of my feet propped up on the board next to it, and moves across the concrete block to a opening in the side. I hear it moving through the dried leaves by the car port.
"Mind the black snake," I tell it. Yes, we have one of those, too. Over the winter it'd been camped out in the well house (the neighbor had put a heater in there to keep the pump from freezing), but now with warmer weather, it decided it needed a summer home, and so now there's a rather large snake hole out back, on the tree line. Hey, as long as it's keeping the mousie population in check (and not coming IN the house!), it's fine by me.