Because bad taste is better than no taste at all.....

Friday, January 30, 2015

#305: Oops, I forgot to get (re)married

So Dent and myself have been a pair for a few years now, and now the questions have started.

From other people. You know the questions I mean.

".............So, when you two getting married?"
"We're not?"
"Why not?"
"Why would we?"

People assume we are married, when they meet us. And act all shocked when I tell them that we are not.  As "open" as society likes to think itself to be, it still thinks along the same channels sometimes. But I tried that once. I tried being the housewifey at home with the rugrat holding onto the apron. Hated it.  Yes. I know one bad marriage shouldn't spoil the whole marriage barrel.  I am really trying to think of the other person here. Wouldn't be fair to them should they be "tied" to me. 

Because I can't commit to myself, much less to anyone else.

That's not to say I'd never get married again--but the "feeling" has to be there. Has to be right. And while I love Dent to death almost, couldn't imagine my life without him, there is a growing feeling that, at the end of the day, we might not be the best for each other. We are at different stages in our lives--mine involves checking out a map, to see where I need to go.  And his apparently means "been there, done that, got the tee shirt". 

Something, someone else in my life I may have to let go. Maybe. 

It's going to be a painful next three years, if I am right. Hope I am not.

Stay tuned.

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